


no hope here

by agustdswlw



Series: totally not projection fics [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2019-12-17
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:14:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21836524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agustdswlw/pseuds/agustdswlw
Summary: remus hates everything about himself.
Series: totally not projection fics [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1573678
Comments: 2
Kudos: 28





	no hope here

Remus knew he was disgusting. He knew that everything he embodied was gross, and crude, and crusty. 

He knew he would never be the flawless beauty of his brother.

He wished he didn’t care so much about being cared for.

Sitting on the craggly rock, an outcropping of a jagged beach, in his twisted part of the Imagination, Remus sat.

He bawled, ugly and wet tears, splashing onto his hands and turning his ruffled, itchy suit into a cold, wet mess.

The freezing rain stung his cheek as the storm got bigger, and more intense. 

“I’m disgusting.” He says to himself, picking up a rock with a thin edge.

“I’m disgusting, and rude, and worthless, and trash, absolute filth-” He hisses as he drags the rock across his upper arm, the dips in the rock catching on his skin. The rock scratches until it cuts into blood, the dark red barely discernible from anything else in the storm. 

The rain stings at the cut, cold, harsh drops inside his skin. 

He drops to his knees, hitting the jagged ground with his shin, little spots of pain everywhere. 

“I want out, I want out, I hate this, I hate being unloved-”

The sides would. Right? Because they had to. That was their obligations.

Just once did he wish his ideas actually mattered.

“It’s all wrong! I’m trapped in a cage of blades and I can’t say a word!” he screams at nothing.

/Maybe there’s hope for you after all/

No, Remus thought, walking to the edge of the water. There was no hope here.

And there never would be, he thinks, as a wave, cold, brutal, and unforgiving, drags him out to sea.

**Author's Note:**

> this isn't a cry for help i'm just venting


End file.
